Disclaimer: Paramount own Voyager and all characters contained therein. I'll mess with their heads a little, but I can guarantee they won't be any more damaged when I've finished with them than they were when I started. In fact, they may even be a little happier. ;-)
Summary: Someone's messing with the heads of Starfleet's finest, and when the truth finally starts to come to light it brings with it something two of their number had been trying not to set free.
Author's Notes: This is a bit of a return to my roots, I guess. I know I've been a little absent from J/C for a while, but please take this as an indication that I've not abandoned the fandom completely. You don't get rid of me that easily! Oh, and please don't be put off by what might be implied at the beginning of this fic - I promise you, the ending will be agreeable.
All Things
Kathryn stirred from her sleep, the heat of the night making her restless. As she kicked the sheets aside a stifled moan came from the body beside her. It seemed the other occupant of the bed wasn't happy having the covers torn from on top of him, and he clawed to retrieve them. Kathryn let him, and tried to return to her slumber.
In the next room, Chakotay curled his arms around the woman lying next to him. He felt amazingly content, despite waking long before dawn. Carefully, not wanting to wake his companion, he reached out a hand to brush a dark lock of hair from her face. She gently smiled in her sleep, presumably a reaction to her dreams, before snuggling closer to him. Chakotay let a smile grow on his own face, and closed his eyes to wait for the morning.
=/\=
The sound of a door opening caught Evelyn's attention, and she looked up from her breakfast to see who had finally risen from their bed. She herself had been up for an hour, quietly crawling out of bed so as not to wake her companion. Now she was joined by a man with sandy hair, who was himself trying to close the door he had just emerged from with as little noise as possible. Evelyn wanted to say hello, but was disturbed to find she had no idea what name to call out. The man was emerging from a bedroom in a house that she was obviously living in at the moment, so why didn't she know who he was?
Come to think of it, the house itself didn't seem too familiar to her, and Evelyn had to wonder why she hadn't realised this before. She had known where to find something to eat, and had even managed to find herself a book to read while she ate, but as she visually scanned the many doors leading off from this living area she had no idea where they led.
"Are you okay?" the sandy-haired male asked, and Evelyn's attention snapped back to him. He was now standing next to the table at which she sat. "You look a little confused."
"I guess I am. This may sound a little blunt, but do I know you?"
"I was just thinking the same thing. I mean, we're obviously staying here together, so I feel like I should, but I have no idea what your name is or what we're both doing here."
"Well, my name is Evelyn."
"Tom."
Just then a third voice joined them. "Good morning." Tom looked round to see the door he had so carefully closed was open once more. "Tom, you didn't have to close the door so quietly, I was awake."
Tom just stared back in reply, as he realised he had no more memory of this woman in front of him than he did of the one sitting at the table having breakfast. Other than waking up with her, of course. Yet she obviously knew his name. It was more than a little disconcerting. He was spared the trouble of saying anything when Evelyn spoke up.
"You know his name?" she asked. "Neither of us knew each other, and felt we should. Do you know me too?"
Smiling and ducking her head, the newcomer looked decidedly like someone who'd just been caught with her fingers in the cookie jar. "Actually, I didn't know his name. I heard the two of you introducing yourselves."
"Oh," Tom's voice was tinged with relief.
"I'm Kathryn. I have to assume we really do know each other, considering how we woke up, and this." Kathryn held up her left hand, where a simple but elegant gold band encircled her third finger. "But for some reason, I have no memory of you, or of anyone else."
"I think that makes three of us," Evelyn piped in. "Or should I say four." She held up her own left hand, then pointed to the bedroom she had emerged from that morning. "He's in there. It seems we don't know each other, or where we are. Well, I assume that's the case for you, Kathryn."
"Yes. It's a little... disconcerting." She sat herself at one of the stools that surrounded the breakfast table, and Tom soon followed her example. As they each sat there, engrossed in their own thoughts, a third door opened and a woman with dark skin, dark hair and ridges on her forehead walked out. She stopped when she saw the group at the table, and it was obvious to everyone that her posture stiffened immediately.
"Who are you?" she asked.
"That's a good question, and one we could ask of you," came her answer. "I'm Kathryn, and this is Tom and Evelyn."
"B'Elanna. What are you doing here?"
"The same as you, I guess," Tom replied.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means we woke up here this morning, to find we're in some kind of house we aren't familiar with, with people we don't know. Oh, and apparently, that includes husbands or wives."
"Pardon?"
Kathryn showed her ring again, and added, "Tom and I woke up in the same bed, and we're guessing that and the presence of this ring means we're married. Though neither of us has any memory of it. In fact, all I remember about myself is my name."
"Same here," Tom added.
"Yeah, here too," Evelyn agreed.
B'Elanna glanced down at her own hand. "Well I don't know you, but it does seem we have something in common."
As if on cue, her bedroom door opened again behind her and a tall male with dark hair stepped out.
"What's going on out here?" he asked. "And who are you all?"
"Your wife, apparently," B'Elanna answered.
"Kathryn."
"Evelyn."
"Tom."
"Oh brother. Did I drink something last night that I don't remember?"
"If you did, I think we all did. Though that's certainly a theory we shouldn't dismiss," Kathryn replied. "Do you mind if I ask your name?"
"Robert."
"Nice to meet you."
Robert moved over and joined the others at the table, followed shortly by B'Elanna.
"I take it no one else remembers any more than me?"
"Apparently not," B'Elanna again replied.
"Sorry, I didn't catch your name."
"That's because I never gave it. I'm B'Elanna."
"And you're my wife?"
B'Elanna held up her ring finger and stated, "I woke up in your bed."
"Ah, I see."
"The same happened to all of us," Tom added.
"I see," Robert said again. Evelyn wasn't entirely sure that he did.
At that moment, another door opened into the room and this time two people stepped through it. The man was tall and dark, like Robert, but this one had a tattoo over one side of his forehead. The woman with him was also tall, and had shoulder length hair almost black in colour.
"Good morning," the man spoke, as he and his companion made their way over to the group. He received a chorus of good mornings in reply. When neither of the newcomers showed any surprise at finding the now reasonably large group sitting round a table, Tom asked the question on everyone's lips.
"Umm, this may sound a stupid question, but do you know us?"
"No," the man replied. "And we didn't know who each other was either. We managed to establish that we appeared to be married, and that neither of us remembered anything other than our names, before we heard voices out here and decided to come and see what was going on."
"Seems like you got as far as us then," Kathryn replied with a smile. "I'm Kathryn."
"Chakotay, and this is Rayner."
"Tom."
"Evelyn."
"B'Elanna."
"Robert."
"Nice to meet you all. Are we missing anyone?"
"My husband, I guess," Evelyn said. "He was still asleep when I left him in bed, though that was over an hour ago now. Maybe I should go and get him, explain the situation."
"Sounds like an idea. While you do that, I'll check the remaining doors, see where they go," Kathryn volunteered.
"I'll go with you." Kathryn was a little taken aback as Rayner spoke for the first time, but she gestured for her to join her anyway and they walked to quietly knock on the first mystery door, before carefully opening it and stepping through.
Half an hour later, and the group had determined that there were eight of them present - apparently four married couples - and that no one knew anything but their own name. A thorough exploration of the building and its grounds had revealed four bedrooms, two luxurious bathrooms, the large open living area with a kitchen area in one corner, and two doors leading outside. One opened onto a raised patio, the other directly onto the expansive lawn. The house was situated on a hill, and the view from the gardens was amazing. However, there was nothing out there to explain their current situation, nothing to see but rolling countryside despite the distance that was visible all around them.
So now they sat on sofas, contemplating what to do next. Kathryn and Tom, Rayner and Chakotay, B'Elanna and Robert, and Evelyn and Harry.
"I guess it's safe to say that it's not normal for us to remember nothing but our own names," Rayner commented. "So maybe we should consider what's been done to us."
"You sound like you think this was a deliberate act by someone," Chakotay pointed out. "That may not be the case."
"No, but it is something we should consider," supplied Kathryn. "We should pool our ideas, see what the possibilities are. There's the chance something's been done to us, as Rayner said. And I think it was Robert suggested it could have been something we drank."
"Or ate," added Evelyn.
"Or we could have been injured, a blow to the head might have caused some type of amnesia."
"That's unlikely, Harry. If it were one person, I'd say that was possible, but what with all of us being in the same position, and the fact we all woke up after a seemingly normal night's sleep, I think we can discard head injuries."
"Agreed." Kathryn stood as she spoke, and started to pace around the room. "I'm sorry Harry, but B'Elanna is right. Did anyone find anything in the cupboards or bins that might give us some clues? Any food packaging, empty bottles, that kind of thing?"
A chorus of 'no's answered her query.
"We could have been drugged in some other way," Tom added. "I mean, if we don't remember anything before waking up this morning, there's no reason there wasn't someone else here last night injecting us with... with whatever the hell could do this."
"There's no reason that whatever's been done to us actually took place here either," said Rayner, "we could have been brought here by anything, and anyone."
"Why?" All eyes turned to Robert. "Why would someone do this? What do they have to gain?"
"Maybe we're being watched."
"What?"
"Huh?"
"How?"
"Why?"
"Explain."
"Excuse me?"
"By who?"
Rayner held her hands up at the barrage of questions. "Hey, don't shoot the messenger! And it was only a suggestion, I have no more idea of the answers to those questions than any of the rest of you."
"Does it really matter?" Robert asked.
"Of course it does! If we work out what's happened, we may find a way to get our memories back."
"They could just return on their own."
"Or they might not. They might never return if we don't do anything about getting them back."
"Hey, guys!" Slightly startled, Rayner and Robert both turned to Tom. "There's no point in arguing."
"Especially as we have no idea which of you is right," added Kathryn. "Our memories could return on their own, but then they might not. Our main problem is there may not be anything we can do to help us get them back, as it seems we have no evidence to work out how this happened."
"What would you suggest then?" Rayner's tone was almost hostile, and no one present could quite work out why. Before Kathryn could answer, Chakotay stepped in.
"I'd suggest we just get on with our day. I'm sure we can find something to keep ourselves occupied. Maybe if we talk, explore a little more, something will start to come back to us."
"That's it? That's the plan?"
"I think that's all we have."
=/\=
The day passed slowly, as the eight occupants of the house tried to both think and not think about their past, wondering which path might lead to a change in their situation. In the beginning, they had spent time in their four couples, thinking that maybe being with their spouse would trigger some memory. But as the day grew older, the group gradually became less one of four couples, and more a band of eight individuals. Some spent their day outside in the sunshine, others curled up on a sofa absorbed in their own thoughts.
They all had one thing in common: they didn't remember a thing.
=/\=
Evelyn sat down next to Rayner with a sigh.
"You okay?" her companion asked.
"No, not really. This is just so frustrating, knowing there's more to me, to my life, than I can remember. Than any of us can remember. We don't even know for sure that what we can remember is real."
"I guess not, I hadn't considered that."
"Sorry for adding another element of frustration then!"
"Oh, no need to apologise. I do have a question though."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. I hope you don't mind me asking. It's something that's been bothering me more and more all day."
"What is it then?" Evelyn probed.
"It's Kathryn."
"What about her?"
"Well, I guess it's about her taking charge this morning. You did noticed that, didn't you?"
"I guess so. But what's wrong with that?"
"It doesn't bother you?"
"Why should it? Someone needs to really, we're in a situation we know nothing about, it makes sense that someone try to keep us from taking it out on each other."
"But why Kathryn?"
"Why not? It just happened that way, I guess. What, do you wish it was you?" Evelyn's question was met by silence. "You do! Well, rather you than me, that's all I can say."
"But it's not me, it's Kathryn."
"Yes, it is. And maybe we'll find out later there's a reason for that."
"Yeah, maybe we will."
"Look, everyone else is starting to eat. Let's go join them."
Evelyn rose, and rather more slowly, Rayner got up to follow her.
=/\=
Dinner was quiet. As the evening had drawn on, the group had grown even more introspective, each person wondering what they were missing without their memories and knowledge of the lives they had led up to this day. Eventually, one by one, each person had retired to their beds and the house had grown quiet. That was, all but the one person who was standing out on the patio, leaning on the railing that protected from the drop to the gardens below, and staring up at the stars.
Kathryn hadn't tried to sleep. She knew that her mind was too focused on trying to remember something, anything, to even think about switching off. Instinctively, she knew that a lack of sleep was not a new experience for her. The problem was that that knowledge was instinctual, and not conscious memory. As she stood there staring at the stars a sense of peace gradually descended over her, and when, much later, she heard footsteps quietly approaching from behind she had no idea how long she had been standing out there, alone.
"Hey," a soft voice called, and Kathryn turned to find Chakotay stepping up beside her.
"Hey yourself. Can't sleep?"
"No. I was going to get a drink, but then I saw someone was out here. I thought I'd come and keep you company."
"You don't have to."
"I want to. That is, unless you'd rather be alone."
"No, no. You can stay. But wouldn't you rather be with your wife?"
There was a pause before Chakotay answered, "I don't think she is my wife."
"What?"
"It just doesn't feel right."
"Of course it doesn't, we don't remember anything."
"That's not what I meant. Rayner, being with her... it's her specifically that doesn't feel right. I mean, I can't remember what kind of person I had expected myself to end up with, but somehow I'm sure it wasn't her."
Kathryn looked up at him curiously. "People don't always end up with who they thought, maybe that was the case with you."
"I don't think so. And it wasn't just that."
"What else then?"
"Have you noticed how none of the men are wearing wedding bands?"
"I guess it didn't occur to me. But how do we know there's anything strange in that? As far as I know - or think I know, at least - not all men wear them."
"No, but... I guess I just feel that I would. I have this notion in my head that I would have crafted matching bands for myself and my wife."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"I bet they'd be beautiful." As soon as the words left her mouth, Kathryn felt Chakotay's gaze on her, and something in it made her feel uncomfortable, and a little off-balance. Perhaps a little too quickly, she averted her own eyes and stared down at the grass over the railing.
"What about you and Tom?" Chakotay asked.
"What about us?"
"Does it feel right to you?"
"I... I feel like I probably know him. But I guess... well, I'm out here instead of in there with him. Maybe that says something."
"Maybe. Look, I should leave you. You obviously wanted to be alone, otherwise you wouldn't be out here."
"No, Chakotay, stay. Really. I'm enjoying the company. Your company."
"Yes," Chakotay whispered, his words barely loud enough to be heard. "Me too."
=/\=
As the sun started to light the sky, Tom sighed to himself. Half an hour had passed since he'd woken alone, and he hadn't really been surprised to discover Kathryn had never been into their room that night. He wasn't surprised, and he didn't mind. He suspected she'd realised what he had. They couldn't really be married. Though at first they'd assumed their names and marriages were all they knew about themselves, he had since come to believe that their names were all they really knew. He had dreamed last night, and his dreams hadn't been filled with the petite woman with fair skin and reddish-brown hair. No, his dreams had featured a woman with darker hair, darker skin, darker eyes.
The woman who, unless he was mistaken, was now headed right for him.
"B'Elanna?"
She said nothing until she was sitting down beside him. "Somehow I had a feeling you'd be out here."
"You did?"
"Yeah. I'm not sure why."
"Is Robert asleep?"
"Yes. Kathryn?"
"I have no idea. I think she's out there." Tom indicated in the direction of the patio. "She's not the only one out there, either."
"No?"
"No, I heard voices. Hers, and one other. Male."
"Oh. I'm sorry, I guess."
"Why? I'm not."
"Oh." Tom thought he saw a brief smile, but he dismissed the thought as soon as it arose. "So who was it?"
"Chakotay, I think."
"Really?"
"I can't be sure, but it sounded like him."
"Hmm, for some reason, that's interesting."
"That's what I thought." Tom paused, before continuing, "You said you thought I'd be out here. Is that why you came out?"
"I'm not sure. I think so. I felt like I needed to see you, like we should talk."
"That's interesting too."
"I think so."
"I'm glad. And I'm glad you came out here."
"Me too."
B'Elanna curled her legs underneath her, and turned herself to face Tom more directly. As the sun gained more height in the sky, she found herself hoping the others took their time waking up.
=/\=
One by one the remaining members of their group eventually emerged from the bedrooms, the sleepiest of whom appeared to be Harry. He blindly got himself a glass of water before joining the five people already seated on the sofas, taking in their faces, and then asking the question that changed everything.
"Where's Captain Janeway?"
In the ensuing confusion, it was difficult to say who was asking what, who knew what, and who anyone really expected to have the answers. Eventually, it was B'Elanna who managed to get everyone to be quiet, after which she turned her attention to Harry.
"Where did you get that name from? Did you remember it?"
"I... I don't know."
"But-"
"It does seem familiar," Evelyn interrupted. "In fact, I think I might have remembered something, maybe that name triggered it. It's another name, I think. Lieutenant Torres. Lieutenant-"
"B'Elanna Torres. My name." All eyes turned to the woman who was now speaking. "And you're Ensign Evelyn Crosby."
"I work with you. I think you're my manager or something."
Robert glanced at Tom. "And I think he's mine."
"Why are we suddenly remembering things?" Rayner asked.
"Maybe what Harry said sparked it off, Lieutenant O'Neil," Tom suggested.
"Rayner O'Neil..." Rayner repeated, almost as if she were trying the name out for size. "And you're Lieutenant Paris, Ensign Kim, and Crewman Martin." Rayner looked at each of the men as she recited their names.
"So we know who we all are," Tom stated.
"Right."
"And none of us are actually married," Evelyn added.
"Actually, that's not quite true, is it?" Tom glanced down at B'Elanna and grasped her hand in his. She smiled, almost uncharacteristically shy.
"Oh yes, I forgot."
"Don't worry Ensign Crosby, so did we for a while."
"But I am right in saying we all work together?"
"On a starship. Voyager."
"And Chakotay and Ka... the captain. They're Commander Chakotay and Captain Kathryn Janeway. Captain and First Officer."
"So where are they?"
Six pairs of eyes turned to the open door on the other side of the room, and as one they all moved over and stepped outside. There, they found their commanding officers, propped up against the railing with his arm around her and her head resting on his shoulder.
Asleep, curled into each others' arms.
=/\=
Kathryn couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so embarrassed. She'd woken to the sound of someone calling out her name, calling out for Captain Janeway, and suddenly everything had come crashing back into her head. Who she was, what she was, and more importantly whose embrace she was currently nestled in. For a moment she hadn't been sure whether to jump up and run away, or hide her face in his arms. So she had done neither, her crew had gotten the message, and had quietly left her to extricate herself from her First Officer's arms.
Her First Officer. This was not good, on so many levels.
He had woken as soon as she tried to move, and it had only taken a few words of explanation before he too had remembered. Then, together, they had made their way in to join the others, carefully sitting on opposite ends of the only free sofa.
"So, what do we do now?" asked Harry.
"Good question, Mr Kim. We may know who we are, but we have no more idea how to get out of here than we did a few hours ago."
"Does anyone remember how we actually got here? It's seems to be the one thing that I can't remember."
There was a silence as it appeared no one had the answer, until eventually Kathryn answered B'Elanna's question by saying, "I guess not, then."
Then once more, the group fell quiet, each left to their own thoughts again. Though more certain now that they were indeed their own thoughts. It was some time later that Tom's voice echoed through the room.
"All things fall into place." Every eye in the room turned to him with a question sparkling in their depths. "I can't even remember that's the right meaning, but it seems to fit."
"What do you mean?" Chakotay asked.
"I was thinking about what had happened here after we all woke up yesterday morning. We all started out one way, but gradually, things changed. In the last twenty-four hours everything seems to have worked its way back to how it's supposed to be. B'Elanna and I found our way back to each other, Captain Janeway took charge even though she had no idea she was the captain, everyone's had little pieces of themselves the whole time. We just didn't realise it until now."
Chakotay glanced at Kathryn to find her looking right back at him for the briefest of seconds, before she hastily returned her gaze to Tom.
"That's all very nice and all," Rayner commented, "but how's that going to help us get back to the ship?"
No one got a chance to answer her question, as once the last word had left her mouth all eight of them were engulfed in a bright flash of white light. When the light faded and their eyes readjusted to normal levels of illumination, they found themselves back in Voyager's transporter room.
"Okay, that was weird."
"Thanks for that little bit of sparkling insight, Mr Paris."
Chakotay tried to bite back a grin at his captain's words, as the eight of them picked themselves up from the floor. The sofas they had been sitting on had not been transported with them.
"I suggest everyone goes and freshens up, I want to discuss what just happened in half an hour. That means all of you." Janeway looked pointedly at O'Neil, Martin and Crosby, wanting to ensure they didn't think she only needed her senior officers. Pleased at the chorus of "Aye, Captain" she received, Kathryn then lead the way out of the room and down the corridor in the general direction of crew quarters.
=/\=
"I still can't believe I ended up with the captain!"
B'Elanna sighed at her husband, more than fed up with this line of conversation. This was far from the first time he had made such a comment since they'd finally returned to their quarters for the evening. "Tom, will you stop that? It happened, and it was no one's decision but that of whoever did that to us. I'd still like to know who they are, but I guess we'll never know now."
"Probably not." Tom was quiet then for a moment, before continuing. "When we realised who we really were, I was worried you'd be upset that I'd slept with Captain Janeway. Even though sleeping is all we did."
"That's sweet, Tom," B'Elanna chuckled. "But as I've said it wasn't your fault, it wasn't my fault, it wasn't the captain's fault. And you came back to me in the end, even before our memories about being married returned. That's what mattered, that when it came down to it we still found each other."
"You're right."
"Of course I am."
"So what does that mean for the captain and Chakotay?"
=/\=
Chakotay stood outside his captain's quarters, not sure how to approach the conversation he knew they had to have. As unsure as he was though, he knew it had to happen, and sooner rather than later in order to limit any damage that might have been done. Resolving to get this over with, he raised his hand to her door chime and requested entry to her quarters.
When he received her permission to enter, he found Kathryn curled up in her chair reading a report. Probably Ensign Crosby's report on the incident, he mused, she had always been one of the quickest people he'd known when reports had to be submitted.
Once Kathryn realised who her visitor was, she put the report on the table in front of her and sat a little straighter, anticipating the conversation to come and knowing she had to give it her full attention.
"So."
"So."
"That was an... interesting experience."
"It was."
"And we still don't know what was done to us. We probably never will."
"And you're really going to be satisfied with that?"
"Probably not, but I don't think I have a lot of choice. You heard Tuvok's report, he didn't know anything was wrong until the eight of us didn't turn up for our shifts yesterday morning. Despite the work he and many others put in, they found no more evidence of what had happened to us than we did down on the planet. Or wherever we actually were, considering Voyager wasn't in orbit of any planet at the time. I think it's more likely we were on some kind of holodeck on a cloaked ship."
"Based on what?"
"Based on it being the only scenario I or anyone else can come up with that fits the few facts we have."
"But why? And why put us in the situation they did?"
"Some kind of experiment? I don't have the answers now any more than I did in an hour ago, none of this really makes any sense."
"No." Chakotay paused. "I think I'm most confused by the wedding rings. What would have made them do that? If it was an experiment, I would think it was one to learn about us. So it follows that they wouldn't know the symbolisation of a wedding ring. Why put one on you, Ensign Crosby and Lieutenant O'Neil?"
"That had me thinking for a while. The only solution I came up with was that they took that idea from Tom and B'Elanna after they removed us from Voyager."
"It's plausible."
"It's the best explanation I can come up with."
Chakotay nodded in acknowledgement, then looked down at the floor, not sure what to say now that he knew what had to come next. Steeling himself to just say what was on his mind, he looked back up at his captain, and friend.
"Kathryn, I think we need to talk."
Kathryn's voice remained neutral as she replied, "You're probably right, Chakotay."
"In fact, maybe it's easiest if I just say this. I understand."
"You understand what?"
Chakotay sighed. "I enjoyed our chat last night. Despite the fact we really didn't know each other, it was one of the nicest evenings I think we've ever spent together. But I understand that you want to... that we have to put this behind us."
"I think that maybe Tom said it best."
"What?" Chakotay was more than a little confused. He had no idea how Tom of all people figured into this conversation.
"'All things fall into place.' That's what Tom said when everyone remembered who they were."
"Kathryn?"
"What I'm saying is, maybe I don't want to put this behind us anymore. Maybe this was the excuse I've been searching for."
"I hope you're saying what I think you are."
Kathryn got up, and walked over to stand in front of Chakotay. "I'm saying that maybe tonight I want to fall asleep in the right person's arms, knowing exactly what I'm doing, and that it's where I'm meant to be."
For once, Chakotay had no words to reply with. Instead he did the only thing he could at that moment. He stepped forward, and gathered Kathryn into his arms. She closed her eyes, and smiled.
THE END
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