See Part One for disclaimer, etc.
Same Time, Next Year - Part Five
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2383 - England
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"Kathryn, come in and sit down. We need to talk."
"Sounds serious."
"It is, sit."
Kathryn and Chakotay sat down on the sofa, and Chakotay just started right into what he had to say.
"Tom and B'Elanna know."
"Know about what?"
"Us."
"Us! How? As far as they’re concerned we haven't spoken for years. How could they know about us?"
"Actually, they were first suspicious when you told them about Hannah. Something about who you told them you were with when you gave birth."
"All I said is that I was with a friend."
"But they didn't believe the reason as to why you didn't get in touch with Mark, and they got curious. They knew that Mark would have given up some of his time with little Kathryn to be at his second child's birth, so they started to think up other reason's why you wouldn't have called him. All they could come up with is that the friend you were with was me."
"How do you know all this?"
"I went to see them a couple of months ago, and they confronted me. I couldn't lie when they had it all figured out. They checked your leave against my time on Earth each year and of course this weekend matched every time for the last few years. They also know that I stay in England, and that Hannah was born in England. Once they suspected it had something to do with me it wasn't too hard prove why you didn't call Mark."
"Why didn't they tell me they knew? I saw them last month, and I talk to them fairly regularly. They could have said something by now."
"I asked them not to."
"Why?"
"I was afraid that if you knew someone else had found out, you wouldn't turn up here again. I wanted to see you again obviously, so I told them I would tell you they knew. They were really good about the whole thing actually. They're finding it a little hard to understand why we’re trying to make our marriages work instead of being together, but B'Elanna actually thought us meeting up like this was quite romantic."
"It is."
"I know."
"So are they going to tell anyone?"
"No."
"Good. I'll tell you what is going to be hard now though - it's going to be even worse talking to them and not asking how you're getting on. Now that they know that we have resolved our differences they might feel free to tell us things about each other, and I'm not sure I want to hear constant updates on your life with Helen when I'm not with you. It's quite nice hearing about her from you, I almost feel like I know her. But somehow it would be different hearing about how happy you are second hand, I'm not sure how I'd handle it."
"Me either, maybe we should ask them to keep quiet about those things. It's a lot to ask though."
"I know, but I don't know what else we can do."
"You're right. So, do you have any news?"
"Yes, I almost forgot! I took a promotion to Admiral."
"Congratulations! So, you can order me around again."
"Yep. And this time I was happy to accept the promotion. I'm based at headquarters so I get to spend more time with Hannah, but I do still get to go on some space missions. It's the best of both worlds."
"I'm happy for you. Just one thing though…"
"What?"
"Now that you're based at HQ, how are we going to avoid bumping into each other this week when I'm there?"
"I hadn't thought about that. It's a pretty big place, there's no guarantee we'd have to go out of our way not to see each other."
"No, but then again, who could have guessed we'd have met up here three years ago? The galaxy can be a small place."
"Do you have any suggestions?"
"No, not at all."
"Well, I suppose if I stay in my office as much as possible that's a start."
"Where's your office?"
"On the west side of the complex, I can see the memorial fountain out of my window."
"Right, actually that helps. I hardly ever go over that side."
"And I always have lunch in that little coffee bar, the 'Night Owl'. You know, the one…"
"The one with the big coffee cup outside, I know. I go there too. I won't though, not anymore. Can't deprive you of your coffee, can I?"
"Are you sure? I can avoid it for a few days. You aren't on Earth that often, it would be a little unfair for me to stop you going there at all so that I can keep going there like I do everyday."
"The fact that you go there everyday is precisely the reason it should be me that stops. If you don't go someone is bound to notice, and if that same person knows who I am the whole exercise could be for nothing."
"They wouldn't necessarily make any connection."
"We can't guarantee that. You keep going there, I won't."
"OK, you've convinced me. God, it's all just got so much more complicated."
"It's not that bad. I'm only here 'til Wednesday, same as always. We just have to be careful for three days, isn't that worth it?"
"Yes, of course it is. Come here."
***
The next morning brought with it a strange familiarity. Strange because it shouldn't have been familiar. Both Kathryn and Chakotay were fully aware that they shouldn't feel so at home, so at peace waking up in each other's arms when they were both married to other people. That didn't stop it from being true though. They both slowly got out of bed and prepared a breakfast of fruit and yoghurt before heading out for a morning walk, without even speaking a word. They just knew that it was what they both wanted to do.
They were a little way down the road before Chakotay broke the silence.
"So, how about I start with the best and worst things this year. You always go first, it seems like it should be my turn this year."
"Be my guest."
"OK, I'll start with the best as always. I'm sure it was hard for Tom and B'Elanna not to mention anything about this, it was after I'd talked to them about us so after they knew. Helen threw a surprise party for me for my birthday this year. She invited all my friends from Dorvan, and she also managed to get Tom, B'Elanna and Harry to attend. It was a wonderful gift. She managed to pick just the right bunch of people, both from Voyager and my life now. Of course there were people from Voyager that I would have loved to have been there, but had there been any more it would have seemed strange for you not to be there. I think maybe Helen realised that. But it was a wonderful day."
"You said that already."
"Must be true then. Now the worst. Helen and I decided to try for a baby this year. She's wanted kids for ages, and there finally didn't seem to be any reason why not. But after almost nine months Helen still wasn't pregnant. We went to the doctor to get checked out, and it turns out there's a good reason we weren't having any luck. There's a problem with Helen that means there's not much chance of us ever being successful."
"Isn't there anything they can do?"
"It seems not. All the wonders of 24th Century medicine and there's not a thing they can do to help us."
"I'm so sorry, Chakotay."
"Hey, there's nothing to be sorry about. You can't do anything to help any more than the doctors can. We just have to accept it and move on."
"Something about not living for a future that may never happen?"
"Yeah, something like that. How about you, what were the best and worst things this year?"
"The best was just last week, actually. I was in a meeting with Admirals Paris and Nechayev, you know the sort of thing, all pointless talk about what we're doing when we all know if we read the reports the details are all there and we could get on with something far more important. Anyway, I was just willing the time to go faster because Mark and Hannah were meeting me afterwards to go for a picnic. As always happens when you've got somewhere far better to be, the meeting over-ran. About five minutes after the meeting should have ended I looked out of the window to see Mark and Hannah outside pulling faces at me through the glass. Then Mark picked her up and flew her past the window several times. He kept himself below the bottom level of the window so that it looked for all the world as though she was flying past all on her own. It was so sweet, I had to try so hard not to laugh at them. That would have looked great wouldn't it - bursting into laughter in the middle of what was supposed to be a serious meeting. Definitely not behaviour befitting an Admiral. It was great though, and helped the rest of the time pass more quickly. I hate to think what they looked like to other people outside, but Mark obviously didn't care."
"I'm surprised Admiral Paris didn't notice anything. Don't you two know each other quite well? Even if you didn’t laugh out loud you must have at least been smiling."
"Smiling? I only just managed to fight off the huge grin pulling at the corners of my mouth, and even that much was a struggle. I think Owen probably did notice something, but he knows Admiral Nechayev too well to have risked saying anything. I just thank whatever spirits were watching over me that he likes me enough to have ignored it himself."
"Spirits, Kathryn?"
"OK, so it seems like spending so much time with you over the years is finally rubbing off on me."
"So what about the worst thing this year?"
"This was about a month after our weekend last year. In fact, it has got a little to do with you like last year's did, I'm going to have to watch that. We were both sitting on our sofa with Hannah curled up between us talking about children generally. That's when Mark hit me with it - he told me that he hadn't been present at little Kathryn's birth either. Two children and he wasn't there when either of them were born. There was so much pain in his voice when he said it, and I felt so guilty. After that admission the excuse I gave him for not calling when I went into labour seemed so lame."
"What did you tell him?"
"Just that I didn't want to interrupt his weekend with Kathryn. When I think back to that time now I think the only reason he just accepted that is because he was meeting his child for the first time. If he had been thinking more he would have known there had to be more to it than that. Lucky for us he wasn't I suppose, but I still feel guilty. He didn't make Kathryn's birth due to a transporter malfunction in the town he was at for some conference. That couldn't be helped, these things happen, but he didn’t make Hannah's birth because I purposely didn’t call him. And why didn't I call him? Because I was with another man."
"We discussed at the time, it was you who decided we couldn't call him. You know if you had called him he would have found out that I was here, and that you'd been with me. We both know that it was for the best."
"I know, I guess it was a lose-lose situation. Problem is, I actually liked the fact that it was you I had with me when I gave birth. Of course I wouldn't have planned it that way, but I wasn't exactly upset over it. That just made me feel even guiltier when I talked to Mark."
By now they had walked quite some way into the surrounding countryside, and the sky above them had started to cloud over.
"We should get back, Kathryn. It looks like it could rain soon, and I don't know about you but I don't want to get caught out in it today."
"Me either. I didn't realise how far we'd walked, what time is it?"
"Not too late yet, but by the time we get back it'll be almost lunchtime."
"What do we have in for lunch then?"
"French bread and cheeses, and some grapes to go with it."
"Sounds good, let's get going. Do you know a different route back though? I wouldn't mind seeing some more of the area."
"Sure, I'll take us back round the other side of those woods."
They walked the whole way back in silence, using the time to take in the surrounding countryside and just enjoy the feeling of being together. They didn't see another living soul the whole way back which might have seemed strange at any other time, but neither of them noticed. Despite the darkening skies the rain did hold off until they made it back, so a happy and dry Kathryn and Chakotay sat down to a quiet lunch, and a quiet afternoon in each other's company.
***
Sunday morning came all too quickly, and Kathryn got up and prepared to go home. When Chakotay finally woke up she was already dressed and packed, and had started to make breakfast.
"You’re ready early, Kathryn. Has anything happened I should know about?"
"No, I just want to get back in plenty of time to sort some things out before going back to Mark. It's Hannah's birthday tomorrow and I'm supposed to be getting her present this weekend."
"I suppose I should have worked that one out!"
"Your maths skills not quite up to adding one year?"
"It just didn't cross my mind. Give her a birthday kiss for me."
"Sure. Anyway, I haven't got her present yet so I need to go shopping this afternoon. I'm sorry I have to go so early."
"Hey, Hannah's birthday's more important. I take it you've managed to find enough food for breakfast."
"Yes thanks, there's plenty for both of us today. You may need to go shopping for more for the rest of your stay though."
"I think I could manage that. Is this lot ready to eat?"
"Yes, help yourself."
"I meant to ask you, do you have any other recommendations for somewhere to eat at Starfleet HQ? I haven't eaten anywhere except that coffee shop for years, so I'm a little out of touch with which the best places are."
"I've been told there's a nice little café just outside the main entrance, some kind of European themed place I think. I haven't gotten round to trying it myself yet, but it seems to have a good reputation. I suppose an added bonus is that it's nowhere near my office."
"Sounds good, I'll have to give it a try."
"Oh god, I almost forgot. Tom and B'Elanna are coming over for Hannah's birthday tomorrow. They're gonna know exactly where I've been all weekend, and with whom. What am I going to do?"
"Relax, they won't give anything away. I suppose if you get a chance you could let them know that I told you they know, otherwise just try to forget about it. Act normally."
"Easier said than done."
"It'll get easier."
"I know. I should go now."
"Are you sure you've had enough to eat?"
"Yes, plenty."
"OK. I'll walk you to the door."
They both made their way over, Kathryn picking up her bag on the way.
"Well, I'll see you soon."
"Yes, not too soon though I hope."
"Of course not Admiral, I will endeavour to keep myself away from your office!"
"See that you do! I love you, Chakotay."
"I love you too."
And once more, she was gone.
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To be continued...
